Thinking about it, appearance is at least as important as features. I think that would be my primary interest. Perhaps a central unit with sets of switchable panels to suit different atmospheres ... so the table could be adapted to look gothic, Victorian, funereal, an occult altar, something out of a horror movie, etc.
No special features for me. Just a beautiful, haunting looking table, probably resembling a mini cabinet of curiosities. Something along the same lines of what Aiden Sinclair made some time ago, but without the fancy electronics. That was the best one I´ve ever seen.
I think a nice talisman on it somewhere would be a good feature so it has a use even when nothing is on it. Somewhere to hide things so that your fags/cash/mobile don't get stolen. A built in tracking device so if it does get stolen you can track it using software: you can buy these tracking devices online for use in many items. Maybe a built in blackboard or somewhere I can write stuff on. A bulldog clip or similar for keeping things on or in, cards, paper etc... Some place for hiding a script or paper to work from.... That it folds easily.